Thursday, February 7, 2008


Troilism Disorders

Ménage à trois

-(French) a relationship or domestic arrangement in which three people, often a married couple and another lover, share a sexual relationship, although the relationship might or might not involve all three persons having sexual relations with each other. The French phrase literally translates as "household of three".

Troilism is obtaining sexual arousal and gratification by sharing a sexual partner (or close relative) while watching or looking on. A troilist becomes aroused and gratified by the "sharing". It is any form of sexual activity where three people are involved simultaneously. Troilism is a deep desire to have sexual relations in the presence of others. This paraphilia is a distinct form of Scopophilia. Troilists gain their sexual gratification by watching oneself or/and others in sexual scenes. This person takes photos of him/herself engaging in sexual acts, uses video cameras to observe sexual scenes or uses ceiling mirrors.

A paraphilia of the mercantile/venal type in which sexuoerotic arousal and facilitation or attainment of orgasm are responsive to, and dependent upon observing one's partner on hire or loan to a third person while engaging in sexual activitie , including intercourse, with that person. Typically, a husband arranges that his wife has another male partner, so that he can fantasy her in the role of a whore, without which he cannot become aroused.

It is the act of two people performing intercourse while a third watches. A common example is a husband watching his wife have intercourse with another man. This scenario is part of the swinger lifestyle, and varies depending on the participants. Two of the parties are related, such as a married couple. The third party comes from outside the relationship, and can even be a stranger to the couple. Although the couple is usually separated, it is possible for the third party to be the observer.

Like many parts of the swinger lifestyle, there are no set rules for performing troilism. Sometimes the observer pleasures himself, other times he waits for delayed gratification; sometimes he watches from a few feet away, other times he watches in another room through a video camera. Illegal troilisms involve hiring a prostitute for the act, prostituting one member of the couple, one member of the sex act not knowing a third party is watching, and rape or forced participation of any combination of the parties. These illegal acts can often be role-playing scenarios.

Swingers gain sexual gratification by exchanging sexual partners, with another person and looking at the two engaging in sexual act. An estimated 8 million couples experienced this kind of behavior. If two couples are having sexual relations at the same time, it is also considered as Troilism.

A study by Jenks in 1985 shows that swingers and troilists;
-Are aroused by the "sharing"
-Are relatively new in the community
-Have moved often over the past five years.
-Are members of the middle class
-Are conservative in their political views
-Identify little with religion.


wonderful1 said...

My husband has the paraphillia troilism. I did not know that when i married him 15 years ago. It begain innocent enough when he introduced this as a fantasy, then slowly over the next few years it became an obsession with him for me to engage in this behavior with him. There was a lot of covert coerision going on in our marriage, witholding love, affection, refusal to be pleased either in bed or even my cooking. I agreed to go along with this and I regret it deeply. I wish I had remained true to my melf, but I can't go back and change it. But I can tell you something about this type of behavior. My husband procured men from swinger sites off of the internet. In my husbands case these had to be black men. We would meet in places like vegas, minneapolis, l.a. and go to hotel rooms. My husband would orchrastrate what was to happen, which positions I was to be in, he would watch from 3 feet away and video tape the sex. He sometimes joined in and had hetrosex with me but I could sense it was being close to the black man and the black mans penis that turned him on. After the man would leave is when my husband would want to have sexual intercourse with me because it turned him on to ejaculate in me after the black man did first. I was not turned on by this and would tell my husband this, and I drank a lot of alcohol during these encounters to make myself numb. There were times when I would be physically ill after the men left and my husband would become angry with me if i could not complete the sexual act with him. If I did did not to the correct position or forgot what he told me to do, he would become angry and call me selfish and tell me that I should do it again the right way to make it up to him. This went on for 4 years. When I look back on it know it still makes me ill. I often wonder how many other women have or are going through this. I suspect it goes on more than we realize. I believe this to be a sexual deviency. I think people like this should be exposed for the evil people theyu are

Jon Doe said...

Your husband isn't or wasn't evil. The sexual desire one gets is natural and part of the human design, but what turns one person's crank is not the same as what turns another person on. Some people fantasize, some don't. Men are visual creatures, women are emotional creatures and this is by design. That's why you don't understand him. Some people like getting tied up, some like getting pissed on, some like flashing in the park. Human behavior is very complex. I'm not saying he was right to pimp you out, but it was his way to achieve sexual release. I've read that troilism can be the result of a neural disorder or even may have a genetic component to it, but you can't imagine how intensely he is motivated to have sex right after seeing the thing that turns him on. It's like you foreplaying him. And if you don't let him have release, it's very disappointing. You don't have to get sick over it, just be careful. There is apparently a remedy for your husband through counseling. If you ask him to seek therapy and he agrees because he understands how you feel about performing for him in that way, that would be best for you both, but he needs to understand how you feel about it and if he loves you and doesn't want to torture you, he'll seek help.